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Trends In Low Places is a comedic exploration of the hottest and dumbest trends of the day. If you’re in desperate need for unqualified analysis of our world’s most pressing issues, these are the guys for you.

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Podcast Episode's:
TILP 19: Ass-assin’s Creed
<h5>This episode starts with Cush whiffing hard on pop culture and goes downhill from there. We investigate eels where the sun don’t shine, Michael tracks down the sickest beats on the planet, and Cush gets pretty worked up about British people. The boys talk a lot about butts, poop and murder. So… pretty standard episode.</h5> <ul><li>Smart Cities and Soft Lumber. [2:00]</li> <li>Eels in your bumbles. [6:00]</li> <li>Home witchdoctor remedies. [12:30]</li> <li>DJ Geriatric. [19:15]</li> <li>Marsupeople. [25:20]</li> <li>Big Parasite’s Tourism Play [29:05]</li> <li>Fun with nuclear reactors. [33:50]</li> <li>Y’all basic. [40:10]</li> <li>Juicegate. [45:10]</li> <li>Lock it up, Britain. [52:30]</li> <li>Faux terrorism and just a real big damn dog. [57:40]</li> </ul>
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TILP 18: Gwyneth Paltrow’s Downstairs Mixup
<h5>This week, the boys weigh the benefits of flying dildos. Michael wonders why Gwyneth Paltrow wants to shove bad things up vaginas, Mike relives tragic Easter memories, and we examine the darkness that lies in the hearts of men. No big deal.</h5> <ul><li>Uranus. Hehehe. [3:35]</li> <li>You’re a smart feller, I mean a fart smeller. [7:00]</li> <li>Cards Against Humanity, the ultimate barometer of cool. [7:55]</li> <li>Internet vigilantes, leave it to Liam Neesons. [10:00]</li> <li>Dildo all the things. [13:10]</li> <li>Easter grudges linger. [17:20]</li> <li>Back on that grind(r). [22:00]</li> <li>Looking for jade in all the wrong places. [28:12]</li> <li>OK Google, give me an Angry Cyanide Whopper. [33:30]</li> <li>Somehow a worse Donald Trump. [40:20]</li> </ul>
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TILP 17.5: Guess Who Is Coming to Furious
<h5>We watched Fate of the Furious, and y’all…well, we weren’t sober. Please enjoy this rowdy breakdown of the newest installment of the finest movie franchise of this, or any, generation.</h5> <h5>Alternative episode titles include: Diesel Team One, Mr. Diesel If You Nasty, and Punching You In the Dick All Day.</h5>
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TILP 17: Tuna Fast Tuna Furious
<h5>This week, the boys discover there’s such a thing as too much bacon. Cush introduces your favorite new phrase. Michael explores Canada’s strategic porn reserve. Our Shanghai field reporter issues her first communiqué, and it’s killer. Everyone gets a Bible lesson.</h5> <ul><li>Sean Spicer’s Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Press Conference [2:40]</li> <li>Choke artists unite. [6:50]</li> <li>#JasonSegelEatMyFace [8:20]</li> <li>Berenstain Bears and Too Much Bacon. [14:40]</li> <li>Highly skilled Chinese labor. [22:01]</li> <li>Tuna – it’s in your mouth. [26:30]</li> <li>Breakup music. [34:15]</li> <li>Preserving Canada’s rich cultural heritage. And sex comics. [40:00]</li> <li>Crucifixion, you know for funsies! [46:40]</li> <li>The next wave of Biblical edutainment. [53:40]</li> </ul>
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TILP 16: Do a Barrel Heist!
<h5>We finally pulled off a live show, and it’s a banger. We talk about crackheads, the restorative properties of Publix chicken tenders. Michael investigates the greatest heist of all time. Cush betrays a severe misunderstanding of science, which should not surprise long-time listeners. The boys advocate healthy pee habits.</h5> <ul><li>Chicken tendies cure all ills. [1:45]</li> <li>The Highway Collapse of Northern Aggression. [3:05]</li> <li>#shotsfired [7:15]</li> <li>The sweetest crime in history. [9:03]</li> <li>The last action punchboy. [26:00]</li> <li>Flapjack failures. [28:50]</li> <li>The fanciest, dumbest fruits. [34:45]</li> <li>What are you doing, Yahoo? Just what are you doing? [45:00]</li> <li>The tricky side of male contraceptives. [47:20]</li> <li>Hit me with that creamy filling. [56:50]</li> </ul>
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TILP 15: Dr. Rendezvous’ Punch Society
<h5>Reunited, and it feels so, so good. This week, the boys swap fishing stories, ponder the impact of bringing an Xbox to an orgy, and yell at a train. Cush tries to get to the bottom of a dirty story, Michael explores why NBA players go so crazy, and the boys ask if fake news is ever OK. But really, we talk about an orgy for a very long time.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>Michael discovers the Big Chicken [3:15]</li> <li>Red Lobster rules, and we won’t hear differently. [6:05]</li> <li>Hometown orgy goes awry. [10:51]</li> <li>Hey dudes, maybe just try being smarter and less shitty? [14:35]</li> <li>Mind the gap between fake news stories. [25:35]</li> <li>Shaquille O’Neal joins the Flat Earth Society. [34:40]</li> <li>Buzz Aldrin punch club and the best nickname of all time. [40:15]</li> <li>We continue our war on New Zealand. [45:25]</li> <li>Bathroom cameras, but for weirder reasons than you think. [47:26]</li> <li>Canada’s two-ply aggression intensifies. [53:50 [...]</li></ul>
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TILP 14: March Badness
<h5>The boys recorded this one last week, so we called our shot on a March Madness champion - we both missed by a country mile. Cush introduces the least necessary movie reboot of all time, Michael waxes poetic on religion, and we both talk about Pornhub. Maybe too much?</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>The boys dunk on March Madness </li> <li>PSA: Don’t read and drive.</li> <li>Gladiator II: Fightin’ ‘Round the World</li> <li>We rank some Dans.</li> <li>A Bible theme park adventure - now 100% less creepy.</li> <li>Michael gets his wires crossed on the Moses and Jesus origin stories.</li> <li>Breaking down the numbers on porn and dating.</li> </ul>
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TILP 13: Father Ralph’s Demon Emporium
<h5>Though half the duo was profoundly hungover, the boys turn in a real banger of an episode. Michael fixes healthcare, Cush takes a surprising stance on demonic possession, and What’s On Weibo makes a surprisingly non-sexy return. We celebrate the sacred tunes of Journey.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>Mike and Michael make bad choices [1:35]</li> <li>After All These Years, still Daylight Saving Time? [4:00]</li> <li>When You Love an International Women’s Day [10:50]</li> <li>We go Separate Ways on demonic possession. [23:30]</li> <li>Who’s Crying Now? (It’s Cush, playing a VR demon experience. [33:33]</li> <li>Lovin’, Touchin’, Stabbin’. [33:40]</li> <li>Steve Bannon’s Seinfeld money. [40:05]</li> <li>I’ll Be Alright With You, Chinese Police Robuts [41:50]</li> <li>The Party’s Over, pandas suck now. [47:35]</li> <li>Don’t Stop Bein’ Dumb, Canada [50:40]</li> <li>Journey joke. [56:05]</li> </ul>
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TILP 12: Danger Little Sweetmeat Jones
<h5>This week, the boys discuss the merits of weaponizing the dang moon. Michael reveals what happens when sex technology goes too far, Cush teaches Michael a new word, and we explore some of the finest baby names this side of a trash pile.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>Cush is full of pink goo. [1:45]</li> <li>To the moon, Elon. [7:05]</li> <li>It’s about ethics in space rocks, Michael. [13:25]</li> <li>Wearable Technology in Low Places [15:50]</li> <li>Teleconferencing, but with dildos. [26:41]</li> <li>You’re dangerous, Mhavrych. [29:40]</li> <li>Venture deep into the storied lineage of the Sweetmeat clan. [34:23]</li> <li>How far would you go for a doctor’s note? [40:22]</li> <li>Looking for love in all the pun places. [48:45]</li> <li>DJ Pauly D doesn’t respect contracts. [56:50]</li> </ul>
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TILP 11: Welcome to Piña Coladaburg
<h5>Ostensibly the hosts of a show about current events, the boys forget to talk about anything current or relevant. Cush struggles to accept a world in which a live-action Cinderella movie exists. Michael uncovers gnome-based meth economies, and we chat for far too long about alcoholic malt beverages. Better step back, friend – this is New Kids on the Block turf.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>Where carb bonanzas are a pleasure [1:00]</li> <li>2017 gets into the murder business [2:15]</li> <li>The Cushing family’s dark history with While You Were Sleeping [7:20]</li> <li>The boys throw an #AaronsParty [11:05]</li> <li>Cinderella’s gaslight ball [19:55]</li> <li>What’s up with all these 90s, though? [24:41]</li> <li>The Smirnoff ISIS Counterinsurgency [32:35]</li> <li>Crank: High Gnomage [37:27]</li> <li>The worst party bus in history [47:50]</li> <li>Master-Pieces of Pig Theater [53:30]</li> </ul>
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TILP 10: That Girl is Poison
<h5>Welcome to the episode so nice, we recorded it twice. This week, we delve deep into the secret history of the world (spoiler alert: everything is fake and nothing matters). Michael introduces us to a man of utmost conviction and infinite misfortune. Cush discovers his dumb brain is full of dumb movie quotes. We explore the most ineffective corporate training of all time.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>Turns out George Washington can tell a lie. [3:40]</li> <li>You know what else is a lie? Turns out, all of history. [6:15]</li> <li>The NBA All-Star Game, not just for sick dunks anymore. [17:20]</li> <li>World’s Funniest Home Accidental Assassinations [21:50]</li> <li>Hey. Japan. Can you slow it down on the game shows, please? [26:50]</li> <li>Some monkeys play nice. Some rip your face off. [38:00]</li> <li>Rabies? In my brain? It’s more likely than you think. [48:05]</li> <li>The corruption of American youth, one lifelike doll at a time. [52:45]</li> <li>I’ll take [...]</li></ul>
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TILP 9.5: Trends in John Wick Places
<h5>We just watched John Wick Chapter 2, and felt it deserved its own episode. The boys examine John Wick’s good, good murder, his thirst for vengeance, and celebrate that his dog survived until the end. Also, a dick may or may not have been chopped clean off. This has been Trends in John Wick Places, with your hosts John Wick and John Wick, with special guest, John Wick. </h5>
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TILP 9: All Hail Techno-Buddha
<h5>Love is in the air, and this Valentine’s Days the boys whipped up one hell of a horny episode. The boys explore alternative condom applications, Cush recounts his limited sexual education, and Michael draws a hard line on poop pranks. We take our first radical steps down the Noble Eightfold Path.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>I left my heart (and shoes) in N’yaaahlins. [0:40]</li> <li>Condoms on your head. No, the other head. [7:15]</li> <li>Male birth control, yes please. [11:35]</li> <li>Sage fatherly advice. [17:53]</li> <li>The greatest generation wreckin’ fools. [24:38]</li> <li>We find poop in all the wrong places. [34:10]</li> <li>High on donuts. [38:22]</li> <li>TechnoBuddha drops that beat. [45:05]</li> <li>Michael Cushing fan club poll results! [51:50]</li> </ul>
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TILP 8: Fine Corn Cannibals
<h5>This week, the boys chat about the interpretative dancers who opened and closed the Lady Gaga concert. Michael votes with his wallet, Mike admits to some very light animal neglect in the name of love, and the boys explore alternative ocular health services. Also, BREAKING NEWS: Comcast is a garbage company with a garbage service.</h5> <ul><li>Super Bowl and The Wiser Bud [1:00]</li> <li>Where’s the poop, Harry? [6:25]</li> <li>#Boycotts and #SquadGoals [12:25]</li> <li>Dating profile shenanigans [20:45]</li> <li>King’s Hawaiian Rolls &#62; Breitbart News [31:10]</li> <li>Is that tongue on your HMO? [33:50]</li> <li>Breaking News: Teens are Dumb [42:40] (Sorry about the audio issues)</li> <li>Cannibal Hamsters [47:05]</li> <li>Operation Donut Drop [54:50]</li> </ul>
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TILP 7: They Don’t Stop Coming
<h5>This week, the boys take a page out of the Indiana Jones playbook and get down to the important business of punching Nazis. Michael explores our grim future of pig-human hybrids, Mike ponders health food, and we play Smash Mouth for THE ABSOLUTE LAST TIME (don’t hold us to that). We get our mouths on the tastiest trend: the newest creation from the Taco Bell test kitchen.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li><span style="font-weight:400;">Michael reveals his search history</span><span style="font-weight:400;"> [0:30]</span></li> <li><span style="font-weight:400;">Modern day Captain Americas (Captains America?) [9:15]</span></li> <li><span style="font-weight:400;">Planet of the Pigs? [20:45]</span></li> <li><span style="font-weight:400;">Cowabeetus [27:20]</span></li> <li><span style="font-weight:400;">Taco Bell does it again [33:10]</span></li> <li><span style="font-weight:400;">Way too much of a good thing [43:29]</span></li> <li>The Michaels Face/Off [48:34]</li> </ul>
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TILP 6: All-Star, but with an Extra Bone
<h5>You gotta fight for your right…to remix Smash Mouth songs on YouTube. This week, when Mike goes low, Michael goes high. Michael espouses tyranny of the skies, Mike misunderstands basic male anatomy, and somehow Australia finds a new way to commit murder. The boys are joined by their first honest-to-goodness expert to dive into the incredible world of Japanese bidets. Everyone says “butt.” Like, a lot.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li>Women&#62;&#62;&#62;&#62;Trump [0:35]</li> <li>Smashmouth, but it’s actually good [9:08]</li> <li>Toilet Talk, with Oded Eshel [18:08]</li> <li>Smashed knees, porn buffs and crowning babies in the friendly skies [27:44]</li> <li>Mike reveals the limits of Christian school anatomy education [37:46]</li> <li>Did Beyonce teach the world nothing?! [47:53]</li> <li>Australia has one more thing to kill you [54:53]</li> <li>The Official Michael Cushing Fan Club [60:38]</li> </ul><h5>Thanks to RoccoW for use of our theme song, Welcome. Che [...]</h5>
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TILP 5: Snake Plisskengate
<h5>Someone check on Jason Priestley, because we’re pretty sure 2017 has rendered all celebrities immortal (please don’t prove us wrong). This week, Mike struggles with Internet personalities, Michael explores China’s most vicious gangs, and everyone deals with random urinal buddies and the hilarity of Trump’s inauguration. Mike takes issue with how we label scandals; things get loud.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Hey Wikipedia, check your shit.</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">#saltbae</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">PeeBuddies4lfye</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Bruce Springsteen and the Z Street Band</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">John Lewis is all action; we’re all talk</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">LOTS OF WEIBO</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Snakes gettin’ sexy, Channing Tatum gettin’ noodles</span></li> <li><span></span></li></ul>
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TILP 4: Bed, Bath & Beyonce
<h5>This week, Mike and Michael take a break from the unceasing torrent of celebrity death to explore survival in deep winter conditions, question why Georgia babies are so thirsty for murder and pitch celebrity product endorsements. What’s On Weibo makes its triumphant, highly sexual return.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Why can’t you spell, you dumb idiots? </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">I Want It That IPA and other boy band beers. </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Dumb shit from CES 2017. </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Ugh, MILLENNIALS and how morons pander to them. </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Funeral strippers. </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Reptile people, and is Gucci Mane a clone? </span></li> </ul><h5>Thanks to RoccoW for use of our theme song, Welcome. Check out Rocco on Bandcamp: roccow.bandcamp.com/album/-</h5>
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TILP 3: Don’t Be a Dick
<h5>This week, Michael and Michael dive into the unrelenting hubris of humankind, Christmas miracles and the delicate masculinity of sweet, fragile boys. We’re joined by our first guest, Curtis, to goof on Star Wars, explore nerd ownership and much much more.</h5> <h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li><span style="font-size:10pt;">The Insurgency Against Christmas </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Dildo Nativity, Satanism and Morrissey Hates You </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">OF COURSE MORE PEOPLE DIED. </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Rogue One, Gender and Race in Nerdery </span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Fragile Masculinity and White Genocide (whoopsiedoodles!) </span></li> </ul><h5>Thanks to RoccoW for use of our theme song, Welcome. Check out Rocco on Bandcamp: roccow.bandcamp.com/album/-</h5>
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TILP 2: Fewer Problematic Opinions!
<h5>Highlights include:</h5> <ul><li><span style="font-size:10pt;">2016’s reign of terror continues unchecked.</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">When good technology goes bad, automation and Mike Rowe</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Why are baseball players so friggin’ WEIRD?</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Snapchat, and Michael is old.</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Tribalism and toxic masculinity in sports culture</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Dumb police punishments</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Satire in an absurd world</span></li> <li><span style="font-size:10pt;">Ed Sheeran returns to the fold.</span></li> </ul><h5>Thanks to RoccoW for use of our theme song, Welcome. Check out Rocco on Bandcamp: https://roccow.bandcamp.com/album/-</h5>
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